rabbit heart.

Now playing - Rabbit Heart - Florence and the Machine.

Have you ever wondered if you are not who you think you are? That you're just living in your own little world and don't even know.

Like if you are seriously mentally ill/disabled and to you everything looks normal and you look normal to yourself but really you aren't...do you know what I mean?

Sometimes I think I'm like that. Like I live in my own universe. Like I think I'm normal and all that. That the world seems normal to me but people see me like I'm retarded (I know that's a bad word but I can't help it, I might be a freak people!!...not that retarded people are freaks... oh you know what I mean!!)

Maybe I'm not making any sense. My mum says that I need to wake up and see how great I really am (but she's biased, she's my mum she's supposed to think I'm great!). So when she says I'm great I can't belive her you know. It's the same with my friends (even though they say all the right things whenever I'm having a personal dilemma which seems to be always they're biased as well). So who can you trust?

Not your parents because they're biased.

Not your friends because they just want to be nice, most are not honest even though they should be. They just don't want to hurt your feelings. Which is good in a certain way...but not good in the other way if you know what I mean.

And you can't trust yourself becuse some people don't really have a good sense of reality. What if you're one of those people (that is what I was talking about there at the top you see!)? What if you're one of those people you see on American Idol or So You Think You Can Dance...you know the people that think they can sing or think that they can dance brilliantly but then they really can't and are soooooo horrible and then they get laughed off stage and feel like they've just made a fool of themselves in front of the whole world...What if I'm like that and I really don't know?

What if I look/sound or act really stupid and get laughed at all the time and not even realise!!

How horrible is that!!!

Well I seriously do hope I'm not like that and I hope, dear reader whoever you are that you're not like that (and that you live a wonderful life but that's a whole diffrent matter).

Anyway...enough with the nonsense.

I seem to desperately need these Vagabond Wedges they're just soooooo god damn beautiful! Ahhh.

Well I know I'm not making any sense today and I'm terribly sorry about that. Maybe it's the cold.

Have a nice evening.

Love, S.